Contemplating the End of the Journey

English: Bankrupt Bank (Крах банка) by Vladimi...

English: Bankrupt Bank (Крах банка) by Vladimir Makovsky – scene of a bank run. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I have a lot to contemplate as that, which has dragged on for years, is now becoming front and center in our lives.  All the days, months and years of pain and confusion; standing on the truth only to discover that truth has its place and sometimes it’s not quite where we have envisioned; will all be coming to an end.  I feel like a weathered warrior, sensitive and stinging from the last eight years of relentless battle, achingly standing up to approach one last surge.  Confident but weary; strong, yet somewhat weakened by the experience to the point of being enveloped into a somewhat surreal life at times.  Time has been eaten up so fast through this painfully drawn out process.  Life continued to flow by at a pace that, although normal in the process of life, seems like breakneck speed; yet this whole nightmare, in contrast, seems to go at a snails’ pace.

Almost rapid fire, the pace has started to gain momentum as we still try to get the bank to relinquish an insurance check that they have had no right to; and, in the first week of October, we will take on, not only Ocwen, but US Bank as well, as we attempt to get the bankruptcy court to reopen the adversary proceedings to add damages to our judgment.  Fortunately for us, the case will be in front of a Chapter 7 judge as opposed to the Chapter 13 judge, whom, along with the Chapter 13 trustee, felt that the bank getting their monies far outweighed the fact that a crime had been committed.  So, in some way, this does make me feel a wee bit better.

You have to understand that this was not our first dance with this particular judge or trustee.  We went into bankruptcy in 1997, when the medical bills for my youngest daughter were devastating us financially.  However, in order not to beat a dead horse, I can only say that, we not only lost all the monies paid to the court over a six-year period; we also lost a paid off car and owed more on the house than when we began.  The very thought that we then went back in front of the same judge and trustee, the second time, to have them try their hardest to compensate the criminals for forgery and fraud, has, needless to say, tainted my feelings about this arm of our judicial system.  I don’t know who abused us more, the court or the bank.

That being said, I do have total faith in our lawyer and the firm he is associated with.  I have every confidence that he will do a stellar job and get us over these last few hurdles.  I do find it humorous that the attorney in the insurance case is the same one in the bankruptcy case.  I can only hope that she does as good as she did in the default hearing; which, had she been my lawyer, I would have fired her for incompetence, but that’s me.  Her preparation for the case was definitely minimal.  She does, however, for the bankruptcy case, have another attorney at her side; most likely because of how the last hearing turned out.

My attorney stated that the bank considers our request for the bankruptcy court to reopen the adversary proceedings, to add damages is, in their words, “totally ridiculous.”  I think that a homeowner, after reporting a crime, then having to defend the truth for almost a decade as a tad bit ridiculous.  I think that it’s downright criminal.  Seeing that the bankruptcy court has decided to hear the motion, maybe this judge doesn’t think it is so absurd.  Only time will tell.

I’m not sure what the future brings for my husband and I; however, what I do know is that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  We are the ones that have the upper hand at this point, however, after riding the litigation train for the past eight years, I am painfully aware that not all is as it seems; and nothing is cut and dry.  To that end, my husband and I have made a pact, that no matter how this ends up, we are going to be good with it.  We cannot allow this crime , once it is said and done, to have any more time in our lives and we will move on as God intends us to do.  That does not mean that I will abandon any of those who are fighting this cause.  I have gained too much experience not to try and help.  When I say that we are done, it means that we will not dwell on the past eight years of personal pain.  We will move forward and try to show others how to move forward as well.

The hardest part of this journey is within our own minds.  Our sense of security and trust has been ripped from us, yet we are the only ones that can insure that their crimes against us gain no foothold.  We have to recognize that no matter what the outcome of anything that happens in our lives; at the end of the day, we are the ones in charge of ourselves and how we want to view the world.  Because hate is all around us does not mean that we, as people, need to hate.  We don’t have to live by the way the world wants to mold us.  We only have to live in faith; raise our eyes to our Lord and know that he will see us through whatever this world has to throw at us.  By allowing ourselves to believe and stand on our faith, we will weather any journey that this world places in our path.

Never lose sight of the fact that a house is only a house; it is the inhabitants that make it a home.  Never lose sight of the fact that if the house is gone, your family isn’t.  If I had a choice between losing my house and losing a loved one, trust me, that house would be gone in a heartbeat, with no regrets.  As painful as this journey is, when you put things into perspective you will realize that I am right.  This doesn’t, in any way, mean to give up the fight.  It purely means, that before you give your soul away on this journey, remember that there are far greater things in this life than a house.  What you are fighting for is truth, justice and a way of life; not to lose your concept of self.

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